How Sex Self-Care and Money Self-Care are Similar

It seems like there have been a lot of conversations about politics lately. So, I want to talk a little bit about two other emotionally-charged topics: sex and money.


I recently had the good fortune of attending a presentation by a magnificent wealth specialist.


It was interesting to see how many of the points she made about money self-care apply to sex self-care, too. Here are a few of my takeaways.


Image Credit: Katie Harp / Unsplash

It’s good for us to review and change our beliefs about sex and money.


Most of the time, our beliefs about sex and money come from our friends, the media, or family. I probably don’t have to explain why it’s a good idea to review our beliefs about sex and money. It’s good to ask: what is true and what is a myth? What is aligned with our values, and what is not? When we carefully deconstruct our beliefs, we can leave behind what does not work and keep what does. We can learn new things, and we can adopt new beliefs, habits, and expectations. When we change our beliefs about sex and money, we change our experience with sex and money.


When it comes to sex and money, performance is cheap, and authenticity is rich.


Nobody is perfect. And that’s okay because perfection is not the goal. What if the goal was to show up authentically? What if the goal was simply to experience pleasure? Instead of focusing on a perfect performance when it comes to sex and money, what if we focus on the pleasure and the richness of the experience - the giving and the receiving? It’s okay to drop the performance and show up as our authentic ourselves with unique desires, preferences, and boundaries around sex and money.


Always have fun with money and sex.


If it’s not fun, then you aren’t doing it right. Of course, no one can decide what’s “right” for everybody, but you get my point. Choose to have fun always. When it comes to sex and money, things don’t always go like they do in our fantasies. In reality, things get dry, burnout happens, and energy waxes and wanes. Find a way to have fun anyway. After all, they say humor is the lubricant of life.


Positive expectation plus aligned action lead you to your sex and money goals.


Imagine two people. One person frets over what may go wrong, so they never take action. And they remain stuck. The other person holds a positive expectation that if they take action, things will go well. So, they bravely move forward into unknown territory. Which one of these people is sexier, richer, and more attractive? Exactly. Positive expectation is a supportive approach to a conversation, an event, or a partnership – whether sex or money is on the agenda. Action infused with positive expectation can help us get unstuck and closer to our dreams.


That’s it for now. I wish for you to have an abundance of money and fantastic sex.



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